If my 8 months experience of teaching had taught me something, its that classroom is a battlefield, anger is the weapon, and victory and respect are earned through fear.
Now, I do not get angry easily. Perhaps even unhealthily so. I’m just not the type to shout at people. Heck, I can’t even talk smack properly. Being at school, my patience had been tested to its very limits time and again. If I were to have a limit break gauge, I’d say it’s been filled up more times this year than the last 22 years combined!
A few weeks ago the worst I could do was just vent my anger through verbal means. Last week, I smacked a in the back kid for fooling around in class and today, I pulled a kid’s ear for not listening to me in class, pretty hard too. Lately, I’ve been getting angry pretty more and more often, and I started to realize; you get angry one too many times and anger becomes you.
I hate getting angry… It drains the energy out of me. It makes me feel bad about myself..
But, I have been able to control the class much better these days. The kids are paying attention in class like they’ve never been before. So, I’m completely torn now. Should I put a cap on my limit gauge and go back to the likeable teacher who everyone ignores and eventually forgets, or do I let the rage consume me and be a teacher everyone fears but will be remembered for the rest of their life, in a good or bad way.
And then there’s that other option : be done with teaching and start a video game retail empire!! Mwahahahahahaha *coughs*
*Title inspired by Metallica's St. Anger, from their Some Kind of Monster album. Wicked
Now, I do not get angry easily. Perhaps even unhealthily so. I’m just not the type to shout at people. Heck, I can’t even talk smack properly. Being at school, my patience had been tested to its very limits time and again. If I were to have a limit break gauge, I’d say it’s been filled up more times this year than the last 22 years combined!
A few weeks ago the worst I could do was just vent my anger through verbal means. Last week, I smacked a in the back kid for fooling around in class and today, I pulled a kid’s ear for not listening to me in class, pretty hard too. Lately, I’ve been getting angry pretty more and more often, and I started to realize; you get angry one too many times and anger becomes you.
I hate getting angry… It drains the energy out of me. It makes me feel bad about myself..
But, I have been able to control the class much better these days. The kids are paying attention in class like they’ve never been before. So, I’m completely torn now. Should I put a cap on my limit gauge and go back to the likeable teacher who everyone ignores and eventually forgets, or do I let the rage consume me and be a teacher everyone fears but will be remembered for the rest of their life, in a good or bad way.
And then there’s that other option : be done with teaching and start a video game retail empire!! Mwahahahahahaha *coughs*
*Title inspired by Metallica's St. Anger, from their Some Kind of Monster album. Wicked